How Creative am I?

Creative enough to rip this off Erin's blog instead of thinking of something original and interesting!!

1. COLOUR OF YOUR SOCKS TODAY? I think the question is what colour ARENT my socks today

2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? STILL working on 'Lost Christianity'

3. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Here - Dell, U of C - It's a Guiness Pint Glass

4. FAVOURITE BOARD GAME? Settlers of Catan

5. FAVOURITE MAGAZINE? I can't remember the last rag I read besides Group

6. FAVOURITE SMELLS? Jambalaya Brewin, Nahkla Apple flavour,

7. LEAST FAVOURITE SMELLS? The Ocean (I hate salt water), cigarette tobacco, my cousins dog when she needs a bath

8. FAVOURITE SOUNDS: Erin, my guitar, that totally quiet there's no other noise but air moving slowly sound, a good Irish accent (especially Cork or Limerick)

9. FAVOURITE SONG: Right now, 13 women, Bill Haley and the Comets

10. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Distance from God

11. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING: I'm not typically 'thinking' until about 12:30 or so

12. FAVOURITE COLOUR? Deep, bright, radiant blue

13. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? Depends how long it takes me to fish it out of my pocket

15. WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE? Faith, Hope and Love.

16. FAVOURITE FOODS? Cajun!

17. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Depends what

18. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? 3 guesses on that one

19. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Erm... never mind.

20. STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? Awesome unless you're driving in one or having your house blown away by it

21. WHAT WAS OR WILL BE YOUR FIRST CAR? 1986 Camaro. Aw yeah

23. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? Of course?

24. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT

BE? Well, for now I have it, otherwise I guess I'd go with a full time youth speaker.

25. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR WHAT WOULD IT BE? Already did, it was insano blue

26. THE GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY? Overflowing

27. FAVOURITE MOVIE? Better off Dead

28. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? My floor

29. FAVOURITE NUMBERS: 4

30. FAVOURITE SPORT TO WATCH? Hurling, Surfing, Football (canadian), Big mountain skiing

31. FAVOURITE QUOTE: "Gee Ricky, I'm sorry your mom blew up"

32. PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? I stole it! MWAHAHAHA!!!


I'm so lame

So Very tired

Man, really tired. Went up to Elbow Falls today with David and Sinead and Erin. Had a great time. It was a really nice day, and took LOADS of pictures. Also forgot my boots beside the car and had to go back and get them. ALSO eat WAAAAAY too much. We went to the Moose Mountain Diner in Bragg Creek. SOOOO GOOOD. Our waitress was hilarious too.

Went to Erin's place after, met her aunt Marcy. Mad mad woman, had a great time. Also eat Lasagne and angel food cake. Now after all the food, feel like I'm gonna die. Groan. Aw crap, just reliazed I left the lasagne in the car. Gotta go get that before bed.

Good weekend. I missed Jason and Vanessa though. Two awesome instructors from Houston in teaching swing lessons. It would have been cool, and there was at least one party. I miss dancing, but at the same time, I'm not too sad about missing the weekend. Last night went to the chop house for free dinner (Erin's dad had $100 there). Service was crap, but the rare, 14 oz prime rib was gorgeous.

So that flame war I kinda got into (go down a couple posts, there's a link to it) got kinda out of hand so I backed away from it. In my defense this guy decided for some reason that I'm still unsure of that I was not born again and was most definitely hell bound. I don't understand how someone who reads 200 words I've written can decide whether or not I've made such a personal decision as to believe in the salvation that comes from Christ. The guy was pretty anti-Catholic, so I got some apologetics practice, but he had some very skewed and dangerous beliefs. The kind that have lead to violence, or at the very worst, pushing many many people away from any sort of faith in Jesus. One of the most dangerous belief patterns was that since he was saved, he could speak God's truth. It made it so he was always right, and anyone who disagreed with him was hell bound. I'm done on that board... its stupid. Pray for the guy though, that God will soften his heart and bless him with a little more compassion and meekness.

Oh yeah, madly in love with Erin... just thought I would mention that... can't hold it in.

Stop! Theif!

I snagged this from Alison's blog. Whee!


10 People you want to spend more time with:
1) God
2) Erin
3) The other Fitz' especially her dad cuz I still need to drink beer with him if we still can
4) Sandy/Arlin
5) Jason
6) Jason
7) Matt
8) David/Sinead
9) Christine
10) Dancers

09 Things you're looking forward to:
1) Seeing my girl
2) White water season
3) My next day on the ski hill
4) The Parish Mission
5) Being Debt Free
6) Selling the Camaro (gasp!)
7) Getting married/having sex
8) Ninja class
9) Getting my thesis done/getting my ministry brochure out

08 Things you like to wear:
1) Fedorahs/tandos/pork pie hats
2) My Claddagh
3) Hawaiian shirts
4) Airwalks
5) Pinstripes
6) Zoot Suit
7) Retro 1950s
8) My CSSR Cross

07 Things that annoy you:
1) People who don't listen
2) Poorly executed liturgy
3) People telling me my job isn't a real one
4) My masters thesis and or supervisors
5) People who tell me Catholics are going to hell
6) Bills
7) My lack of will power

06 Things you say most everyday:
1) 'Sup
2) Hey Sweetie
3) Morning Nettie/Michelle
4) Thank You
5) Totally
6) Shut up!

05 Things you do everyday:
1) Shower
2) Go to work
3) Check my email
4) Talk to Erin
5) Pray (well, I try)

04 Bands/people you've been listening to a lot lately:
1) Bosstones
2) Steve Angrisano
3) Indigo Swing
4) Alison Krauss

03 Movies you could watch over and over again:
1) Aliens
2) Better off Dead
3) Shawshank Redemption

02 Of your favorite songs at the moment:
1) She Just Happened
2) How Lucky Can One Guy Be

01 Person you would spend the rest of your life with:
1) The churchy (but sincere) answer is God, but referring to a PERSON, well, I'm not 100% sure yet, but I'm getting a pretty good idea

Fun Times

Well, got a lot of new toys. Speakers for my computer at work, a new stereo in the Valiant (back off, I have a security system too), and a new satellite reciever for my basement (mmm... American Satellite) Do they make me happier? No. Sigh.

So I decided this week that I'm not Holy enough. I've been doing a lot of self reflecting and realized my ministry is too many words, too much ego, and not enough from the heart. Not enough from having a deep relationship with God. Not enough out of love of young people and desire for them to know Christ.

I've told a few people and heard a lot of 'What? you're doing great! You're a great guy'. Well, on the outside... my inside is drying up and I need to tap back into the well that got me here to start with. My first start will be prayer. I'm going to try to pray for 10 minutes before work every day, and 10 minutes before bed every day. From there we'll see. I could use some updates on apologetics, or even the basics. Hearty stuff instead of brainy stuff would be good.

Was at Erin's last night... good times. Ended up in a big conversation with her and her mom... we discussed everything from parents and teachers, to whether or not dogs have souls. It was fun... we all got a little agitated, which I always enjoy, but it didn't escalate which was cool too. I used to have discussions like that with my mom a lot, but we started getting a little too personal with them, so we backed off a bit with them. I miss it.

I'm pretty confused in my faith right now. I'm not sure whether I'm close to the right path, and if I am, whether I'm living and teaching it well. I'm in a space where I could use some guidance, so I need to find someone I love and trust to talk to about it. I wish I could go somewhere to find a spiritual director, but I don't even know where to start looking. I'm thinking I'll ask Fr. Bill and Sister Ernestine. My life is getting more serious, with career, girlfriend, money, the whole nine yards. I'd like to keep on a good road and stay on it instead of wandering around confused like usual. I guess in the end I know I love God, I know salvation through Christ... I'm just not sure what that means about life, evangelization, and my relationships.

Speaking of relationships, I do have one... its been my anchor and my balloon all at the same time lately. I'm so madly in love with Erin. Being with her makes me feel loved, feeling loved makes me think of God, thinking of God makes me want to be better, and to be a man of integrity and service. IT makes me want to be the me God created. I love that feeling.

Oh yeah, I started a flame war with a few folks on a message board about faith. ITs funny. Check it out.

http://killdevilhill.com/phorum/list.php?f=45&a=2&t=9132

Mine are the postings under foxy. Raphael is a guy who thinks I'm hell bound. I'm ignoring most of the rest cuz I see very little productive on the board... but our discussion is funny!

Cheers kids

So much to write

Wow... A lot of stuff has happened in the last little bit here... so much to say.

The funeral was wonderful. Really tough, but it was a beautiful testament to my Grandma and the loving impact she had on her kids and grandkids. Lots of tears from everyone. Me and Josh and Chris sang Angel by Sarah Maclachlan, and there was letters and poems read. The Eulogy was good too.

It was good to have the whole family together. There wasn't a grandchild or great grandchild not there. After on thursday, my aunt Gloria had everyone over for real italian lasagne, deep fried turkey, and LOTS of beverages. Me and some cousins and my uncle Ron sat up until 6:30 am that morning, then we all just crashed on Ron's living room floor. It was much needed. The night after we had dinner at Aunt Penney's and again had the whole familiy together. Ended up a lot of the night recording the song in Chris' little bedroom studio. That was fun, and it was a good chance to escape the chaos for a while.

The internment was tough. It was a humbling and really sad moment for me seeing one of my role models, and the toughest man alive (Grandpa) being supported by his children when his knees buckled. He loved my Grandma so much, I wish I could do more to make him feel better. He was telling lots of stories, and telling us how proud Grandma would have been of us. He even commented on my shoes (black and white) and told me Grandma used to love those back in the 40s.

I can say though, I missed Erin like mad the whole time. I would have loved her there. It would have been great for her to meet the whole family, and hear all the stories about Granny. I guess it wouldn't have been the best time though, I mean, it will be better for her to meet them when we aren't all mourning. I still would have loved her there though.

Last night was great too... we went Karaoke. Usually when we go, we kinda make our presence known through vivid stage performances, funny songs, etc. This time was no different, with me singing stayin' alive in a tight falsetto the whole time, Erin and Christine singing Why Can't I, but to Sinead, Matt doing his trademark Welcome to the Jungle, and Erin picking random hard to sing song for Ryan. IT was great, we were the shit, until buddy gets up and completely destroys us with Black Dog. This guy could be a professional rocker. It was awesome. Second round was less funny, but still good, with Weezer's Buddy Holly, me doing Daddy Sang Bass (JC woulda been proud), and David and Sinead both got up too. It was good times.

Today the new stereo goes into the Valiant, which is awesome. I can't wait to have good tunes in my baby!

I guess that's it.

Need a break

I need to take a break from the family. I was up till 6:30 am last night and my introverted side is screaming for attention.

I stole this from Alison's Blog. I cut out the ridiculous ones that are obvious when you look at the never had sex one

(_) I have never been drunk
(x) I never have smoked pot
(_) I never have kissed a member of the opposite sex
(_) I never have kissed a member of the same sex
(x) I never crashed a friend's car
(_) I have never been to Japan
(_) I never rode in a taxi
(_) I never have been in love
(_) I never have been dumped
(x) I never shoplifted
(_) I never have been fired
(x) I never have been in a fist fight
(x) I never snuck out of my parent's house
(x) I never been caught masturbating
(x) I never pissed on myself (unless baby-hood counts)
(x) I never have been arrested
(x) I never made out with a stranger
(x) I never stole anything from my job
(x) I never celebrated New Year's in Time Square
(x) I never went on a blind date
(_) I never lied to a friend
(x) I never had a crush on a teacher
(x) I never celebrated Mardi-Gras in New Orleans
(_) I never have been to Europe
(_) I never skipped school
(x) I never have thrown up in a bar
(x) I never have purposely set myself on fire (it was a total accident!)
(_) I never have eaten sushi
(_) I never have been snowboarding
(_) I never have been happy with myself
(_) I never have met a movie star
(_) I never went to a prom [grad counts, right?]
(_) I never bungee jumped
(_) I never have been to a pop concert
(_) I never have dated someone for over a year
(x) I never sold naked pictures of myself
(_) I never ate a mango
(_) I never watched any of the godfather movies
(_) I never went scuba diving
(x) I never wanted to change myself
(_) I never smoked cigarettes
(_) I never wanted to run away from home
(x) I never had an STD
(_) I never cheated on an exam
(x) I never faked an orgasm
(_) I never tortured small animals for pleasure
(_) I never tortured other people for pleasure
(x) I never gave a fake name on an application
(_) I never bought someone flowers
(_) I never received flowers
(x) I never attempted suicide
(x) I never cheated on a partner
(_) I never thought about cheating on a partner
(_) I never lied to my parents
(_) I never got a tattoo

Oooo fun.

Rest in Peace

I got some pretty harsh news last night. My Grandma Bearss (my moms mom) died yesterday. It was sudden, a heart attack. The word spread to my family fast, which was good. It meant I talked to my cousin, Grandpa, parents, and brother last night. Mom and Dad will be home (Saskatchewan) from Cairo on Monday. I'm getting everything set up for the week and I'll be taking off as soon as possible. No word on the funeral date yet.

To anyone who reads this, please pray for my Grandma (Willa), and for our family. We're tight, so this is rough for us.

It's kinda strange. I was in Regina two weeks ago, and I didn't call them or drop in. We're planning a big reunion in July, and I was really just in and out for a retreat this time around, so I figured I'd just wait till summer. This is really one of those take advantage of any opportunity moments. I wish I could be back in time so I could talk to her one more time.

My friends are amazing. Erin was there when I heard the news, and was a beautifully comforting presence for me. Her mom gave me a big hug too. Later that night Erin took me out for cheesecake (like LOTS of cheesecake) and we met up with Ryan, Dave and Sinead. I needed a distraction so it wasn't just shock and sadness all night, and so they all hung out with me till like 1 in the morning. Erin brought back the leftover deserts for my cousin Josh too. I took Erin home and just spent the rest of the night with her on the couch. It was so great knowing I didn't have to say anything, or pretend there was nothing wrong. I could just be there, sad, and not alone. Everyday she teaches me more about what love really is.

Like I said before though, my family's tight. We'll all get each other through this.

Look out! It's DUE DILLIGENCE!!

Okay, I hate that freakin buzzword. I understand the legal principal, that everyone in an organization, right up to the top guy, has a personal responsibility to safety. I understand it means we need to do everything in a youth ministry context to protect our youth from harm, and not put them in unneccesary risk. I get that. It makes sense. I'm glad our diocese is proactive towards it.

I hate the fear though. If you start imagining all the legal possibilities, it gets nuts. How nuts you ask? Nuts enough that I need written permission from the Office of the Bishop to do anything that involves taking youth outside our diocese. Crappy stuff. Nuts enough that anything to do with water sports is off limits. Sorry kids, no more west ed trips. Never gonna get to do my White Water Retreat. Can't go sailing, or canoeing, or enter the Calgary River Raft Race, or go to a wave pool.

I understand legality better than a lot of people because of all the eithics training they give engineers and all the liability training I got through Rescue 3 International. I've dealt with it on rafting trips as a trip leader. I understand that I have to be all the more creative in the interest of SAFE fun. But this is going overboard. I'm gonna sit on my hands for a while till the official written policy comes out, and after that it might just be time to start making more noise, and I'm gonna need some backup!

SEX!

I've published another 'review' of sorts on my other page. There was an article on CBSnews.com about abstainance.

The link to the article is here.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/03/09/health/main604877.shtml

The link to my review of it is here
Review of the article

Fixed Link

Okay, the link on the sidebar to my talks page is fixed. Click on it to see periodically updated talks and lessons I've given on retreats, to classes, youth groups etc.

Done and done

Finished the YM fundraiser swing dance lessons last night. They went quite well, everyone got into the charleston pretty good. There were a bunch interested in doing more, so I might do an intermediate set fundraiser. Depends on time and motivation. Not sure where I'd go with the money from the next set either, but I'm sure there's some charity out there. Okotoks wants me to go teach down there too... That I think I'd do on personal time and use the money for the laptopage coming up. I need to scrape together $700, but its a nice laptop for the price.

Went to Erin's last night and taught her how to play Abalone. She was quite good for someone who'd never played before. She was picking up my strategies by the second game, and beat me on the fourth one. mmm... Abalone.

Going to the Hop in after ninja tonight for Ryan's b'day. Gonna miss the BEvERages for lent, but can't wait for the 'za!

New Blog

I've got a new blog set up. The address is
foxtalks.blogspot.com

It's talks and teaching I've done on retreats, in schools etc.

Check it out

I'm back!

Well had an absolutely fantastic trip to Saskatchewan. The kids at the retreat were a bit challenging to get to let loose, but they totally did. The evaluations were amazing too. It's awesome to actually KNOW you did something good, instead of just hoping a lot of the time.

Coming home was tough... it was a long drive. Michelle was great though... we were both super tired and stuff, but it was funny cuz we were both pretty giddy and so EVERYTHING was funny. Helped pass the time well. The only real tough stretch was from Brooks to Calgary. Then its the post retreat low. They're always kinda tough. You go from a beautiful place where you are inspiring and being inspired, singing, having fun, and can almost tangible feel the presence of God, to the burdens of your daily life. I crashed pretty hard on sunday night and kinda took it out on Erin a bit. I felt really bad about that, so now I have make sure I just treat her with all the more love (hey, and then I'm applying something I got out of the weekend too!).

Yesterday hit Sunshine with Aaron. It was good to see him before he left. He is the original adventure buddy. It's great to have someone you can totally just bullshit with, but also enjoy the outdoors, be challenged on the ski hills (alas, the student has long surpassed the teacher in that one) and have good serious conversations too. It did good to lift my spirits. Unfortunately, I was also super tired last night, so I was a little anti social at Lauren's birthday... but she knows I was skiing, so I'm sure she understands.

Anyway, that's life in a nutshell. I gotta get caught up on work now. Stay tuned for a couple of talks published on here in the next day or two.